..:: life's a B e A c H ! step lightly into the realm of the unknown. ::..
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Quezon - my paradise...ehem...thanks glenny for this pic.
Sunday, July 31, 2005
  my birthday (July 2) post

i know, i know, it's been almost a month. but i can't NOT blog about my birthday just like i did last year because i definitely want to remember my birthday this time around. :)

can i just say that having your birthday fall on a saturday is the best? because it feels like you're celebrating in two days instead of one - celebration at work on friday and then celebration at home on saturday. for me, it felt like the longest birthday because early in the week, lots of people were already greeting me via text and friendster. :)

i wasn't feeling up for a big celebration. and if i had my way, i would have been bonding and eating ice cream on friday night with a few close friends, and having lunch at home on saturday with my family. come thursday night, everyone was already asking what my birthday plans are. realizing that i can't very well haul everyone to Manila Pen to have ice cream, i finally decided to just have a party in the apartment - which we now fondly refer to as Casa Barberan for all the vices (smoking, drinking, gambling) Marlette and I brought with us when we moved in. hehe. - and then invite my highshool friends over for dinner at home on saturday night.

for me, my birthday really started when i received the beautiful bouquet of pink tulips. i went to the reception area to receive the delivery and read the message:

these might not be growing on sidewalks,
but i still hope it would bring a smile to your lips.

R? i knew immediately that the initial was intentional and the message was meant to confuse. too bad the sender made a mistake of referring to this blog post. hehe. the Ex doesn't read this blog so it took me about 10 seconds to figure out that the flowers really came from Rhea. sigh...that girl, even if she's in singapore, she makes us feel like she's really not. she's the best and when i got home, i put the flowers in a prominent place in my room so i would be constantly reminded of the sweetie that rhea is. :)

come 11:30PM, the party at casa barberan was underway. almost everyone was there. you know how you feel honored and grateful when someone invites you to a party? multiply that tenfold, and that's how i felt looking at all the people who came to celebrate with me. glenn brought the videoke and of course the booze was overflowing. twice, the lola neighbor walked past the gate to check who's causing the raucus at such an ungodly hour (it was 3AM) and slammed the gate hoping to shut us up. we're bad, yes we are. but we were having so much fun.

by 6 AM, we ushered the last visitor out the door. it was real sweet though that some decided to stay and give in to my pagiinarte na bawal umuwi hangga't di pa tapos birthday ko (meaning 11:59PM of that day). hehehe.

we all woke up to the heavenly smell of breakfast at 11 in the morning. the living room looked like it's been through world war III. but there was dude, standing in the middle of the kitchen, holding a sandok with one hand and a pot holder in the other. and then one by one, sleepy and hungover people started walking out the rooms. there was jen, chix, marlette, don, den, bobet and JT.

those moments after breakfast would be my "birthday picture perfect moment". we were in the middle of a mess but to me, everything was perfect. it felt like the world was in perfect sync. marlette started sweeping the garage. jen started on the living room. even dude and i have a strategy - he would mop the floor and then i'll follow him around to dry it. and then people just started righting odds and ends in a somewhat lazy harmony.

but it was when marlette pointed to the kitchen that i felt a gentle tug at my heart. there was don returning stuff in the ref, den putting the plates in the sink, and chix washing the dishes - my SOUVENIRS, marlette said. don, den, and chix who were the Ex's college barkada...i wouldn't have met them had it not been for him. and being with them used to remind of how so much have changed in my life...i realized then that yes, they are my SOUVENIRS. TREASURES even. i consider them my friends now. not just my Ex's friends. and it's just amazing how these people who were so much a part of my painful past can now bring great joy to my life.


there goes my phone, i read the message and laughed out loud:
MAMA: Happy Birthday PANGGA! Umuwi ka na kasi magluluto pa tayo.

hehe. classic talaga mama ko. i hurriedly took a bath and met iyah (who, thankfully was in glorietta).

my saturday celebration was more like what i had in mind. i invited only a few people so we can talk more and catch up. chie was there, so was iyah and arvie and roma. and then there was also eva and vi. the food my brother and mom cooked (i missed all the cooking because i got home late. hehe) were all delicious. up to now, i get hungry when i think of my brother's kare-kare. yum!

after dinner, we went to hang out at the Lanai Red - this cool bar in WestGate near Ayala Town Center. i felt kinda bad really that everybody else was still in the mood to hang out, but i was already too sleepy because i've been up all night the previous night. i became a party pooper at my own party and went home at 2AM.

eva and I still spent some more bonding moments while getting ready for bed. it was when my head hit the pillow that i realized that this is one almost complete birthday. everyone that matters in my life shared it with me. old friends and new friends and family.

my world isn't so bleak anymore. compared to my birthday last year (i didn't want to remember the turmoil so i didn't blog about it. hehe), it felt good to be looking forward to occassions like this again. although that's not to say that my past will never creep up and grab me again. i know there will still be moments...but i'm stronger now. and my heart is healthier now. :)


my nephew is growing so big already...he's thinner now because he's too malikot. but i was glad to discover that he can speak more words now and can tell a story that i can understand. :)

these are pics i took on my birthday...he was hanging out in my room and wreaking havoc in it. hehe.

nope, that is not a hat, that's the box of his birthday present :)


a birthday realization:
silence really IS deafening.

i want to be swept off my feet because i know i'm worth it...


..::[this is me :)]::..



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